Overall, Week Two was better than Week One, even though LaKisha turned in the best performance the first go-round. Four more wannabes go home tonight. Plus, Kellie Pickler! Oh, man is that dress trashy! She looks like she should have slid down a pole!
– Seacrest reminds us that WE voted. Right. That’s how it works.
– GREAT reaction from Seacrest and the crowd when he mentions Pickler’s appearance. A few polite claps. Basically, imagine a day of college presentations…and the weak round of “oh, you’re done, woo” applause. Yeah.
– 32 million votes. Damn.
– We recap the week. Read my thoughts here.
– Your Top 20 sing “Joy to the World.” Guys are on stage, dolls sing from the Sponsored Cola Lounge. Then they switch. This feels like an after-school special. Not as inspirational “world” song:
– Time for Demolition! (Which reminds me…more classic WWF/WWE themes coming soon!)
– Phil is safe. Chris Griffin is safe (YES!!!!!!!). Sundance is safe. Beatbox Blake is safe (YES!!!!!!!!!!). Jarod is safe (ugh). Nick goes home. He was pretty decent…no huge loss. He doesn’t seem all that upset.
– Mini-rant time: I get the fact that they get one last performance before leaving the show. But why the hell are they forced to sing the song that got them kicked off the show? If America didn’t like it two days ago, they aren’t going to like it tonight!!! I’m done.
– Let’s get rid of a lady.
– Stephanie is safe. Gina the Witch (although I’m softening on her) is safe. Sabrina is safe. Melinda is safe (YESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). Alaina is going home. She was awful last night. She cries and the other girls cry. She tries to sing the Dixie Chicks again. I cry. Seriously, she can’t sing the song, so the ladies come and hug her. This is painful.
– Seacrest announces some silly trivia contest. Holy mother loving jeebus! Last week’s winner is…ummm…let’s just say I wouldn’t let my (unconceived…that I know of!) children hang with him.
– Oh great, it’s time for Kellie Pickler…who chopped off her hair, got work done on her face, shows a ton and a half of cleavage. She and Seacrest do a really bad comedy bit.
– Seriously, she looks 25 years older than she really is. Don’t like her song, but I guess I’m not her target audience. Maybe last week’s trivia winner is more up her alley…
– Guys Demolition #2
– Chris Timberlake is safe. Brandon is safe. The Phenomenal AJ and Sanjaya are the final two remaining. AJ was good. Sanjaya was terrible. WHAT??????????? Sanjaya is safe???????????? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH AMERICA??????????
– Listen, AJ wasn’t the best, but Sanjaya is the worst! Paula: “This is a singing competition and I don’t think tonight reflects that.” ZING! Randy isn’t happy, either.
– The Phenomenal AJ is classy in defeat and does a great repeat of his performance. See my above rant. This is an exception.
– For everyone wondering why I call AJ “The Phenomenal AJ,” it’s a nickname of AJ Style…this guy:
– Seriously…this is a miscarriage of justice.
– And the final cut of the evening…
– LaKisha is safe (YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!). Haley is safe.
– Antonella, Leslie and Jordin are the final three. Skankilicious is SAFE??????? What the hell???????
– Leslie is going home. She was really starting to grow on me. Read what I wrote last night!
– OK…how the hell can Skankilicious be safe AGAIN??????
– Three people I really liked got cut in WEEK TWO???
– My thoughts on Skankilicious are well-documented and the fact that she’s safe while talented, classy people go home is completely wrong.
Thanks for reading…let’s try not to blow it next week, OK?