My Grandma (father’s mother) turned 85 yesterday! We gathered the family for a celebratory dinner.
As I was sitting and chatting with my aunt and my mom, Grandma handed me a slip of paper with writing on both sides.
“Michael Deah, (she calls everyone “deah”) here is a list of things you should look for in a partner.”
Needless to say, I was a bit stunned.
The slip of paper was 15 pre-marriage commandments. I’ve been single for a few months now and just starting to date again. So I figured I’d share the list with you! This is the list, word for word (I couldn’t make this up if I tried):
Grandma’s Things to Consider Before Marriage
1) Children – primary care giver
2) Financial – clear ideas about each other’s financial obligations and goal. Do both ideas about spending and saving mesh?
3) Discuss expectations of how the household will be maintained. Is there agreement on who will manage the chores?
4) Fully discuss health history – physical and mental
5 ) Is partner affectionate to the degree I expect?
6) Can we openly discuss sexual needs, preferences and fears?
7) TV in bedroom?
8) Listen to each other’s ideas and complaints
9) Understanding of spiritual beliefs and needs. Discuss children’s religious and moral upbringing.
10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?
11) Do we value and respect each other’s parent? Concerns of parents’ interference?
12) What does my family do that annoys you?
13) Are there some things that either of us are NOT prepared to give up in marriage?
14) Move to another place for careers?
15) Is the marriage committment solid enough to face challenges together?
So that’s what my Grandma had to say! I like #7…TV in the bedroom. Ladies–there will be a TV in my bedroom. End of discussion. The other 14 are negotiable.